right now i am just a very still body
really mostly a bunch of involuntary movements
everything at work at the cellular level & not much more
as i sit quietly w/my elbows pressing down upon this rickety card table
my temples cupped in my hands like someone
who's a master at emptying their mind
tossing out the clutter, the brutal baggage
& if you looked at the way my eyelids are closed
you might even think all is well w/me
no, you wouldn't think i am a man being torn apart by tigers
you wouldn't think that about me by the way my legs are crossed
& outstretched in faded jeans
ending at old, black thrift store shoes
loosely laced & calm
no, you wouldn't think that one of the tigers was busy pulling my guts out
& another has what little is left of my Love in its belly
would you?
this business no-one sees
this business that is just my own
repeated daily
if you didn't know
but i go on
i take up my my guts, shortened, tooth-marked & return them to w/in
& finally after reaching down one of the tiger's throats i lift out my Love
it's a little more dissolved by the tiger acid but i hold on to what is left
i'll die performing this task
saving my guts, rescuing my Love
even if there is nothing to fight
even if there is no one to give it to